Dirty Jokes

A Blonde decides to get a porno movie,so she goes to the store and picks one with a fairly dirty title.

When she puts the DVD in and presses 'play,'the screen is fuzzy and nothing is going on.

Frustrated,she calls the store about the movie.

They ask her what the title is,and she replies,'Head cleaner"

Dirty Fun

A cucumber,a pickle,and a penis are sitting at a bar complaining about their lives.

Cucumber:The cucumber says,"My life sucks.I'm put in salads,and,to top them off,

They pour ranch dressing all over me.My life sucks.
Pickle:"The pickle says,"that's nothing compared to my life.I'm put in vinegar and stored

away for months,out of sight.

Man:My life boring.I hate life.

Penis:"so the penis says,"what are guys complaining about?My life is so messed up that i feel

like shooting myself.They constantly wrap me in a plastic bag,shove me in a cave,and make me do push-ups until I throw up.

Dirty Fun

A guys walks into a bar looking really moody,and orders a double-whiskey.

Then he starts rambling on about how lousy a wife he's got,until the bartender finally says;

"You know,i don't understand what you're complaining about.All the.

Dirty Fun

A man and a woman were approaching  their 50th anniversary.

To celebrate,the woman decided she would cook a big dinner for her husband.
Then he said they should do what they did on their wedding night,and eat at the dinner table naked.
The woman agreed.on their anniversary night,at the table,the woman says,"Honey,
my nipples are as hot for you as they were 50 years ago."The man replies,"Madge,hon,that's because
 they are sitting in your soup...